Today’s Motherhood

Two of the most difficult concepts for children to understand are death and dying. Parents should help children perceive death as something natural and inevitable. Bereavement councilors believe that the best way to deal with death and dying is to be honest about the event, although explaining the permanence of death to a little child is hard.

A child’s ability to understand the death of a pet depends on his or her cognitive and emotional development. Children of different ages see death differently. Here are some points to remember when dealing with children whose pets have succumbed to the hands of death.

Ages 2 and below: A child’s emotion is anchored on the reactions of those around him as he sees them the right people to emulate during a pet’s death. Do not be afraid of holding back your grief and be open to show how you accept death at whatever cause.

2 to 5 years old: Like the leaves of a tree falling off during winter and growing back in spring, the little kid would see death as a temporary state. Expect the child to miss the animal as a companion and playmate but not as a love object.

5 to 9 years old: Contrary to the previous stage, the child now perceives death as something permanent however is indulged into that wishful thinking how death can be bargained with or defied. The death of a pet usually bothers the conscience of the child of these ages. Parents should always have the ability to reassure their children that they are not responsible for the death or that they should not be blamed for the tragic ending of the pet.

10 and up: It is in this stage that children are able to understand the difference between living and non-living things. Children now see their pets as just like any other living things which are subject to death at the right time. At this age, children may be bound to react to death in two ways:

a. Go through the stages which are undergone by grown ups including denial, bargaining, anger, guilt, depression and acceptance.

b. They may resort to the following:

• Older children tend to withdraw from the people around them life family and friends. There is a big tendency that schoolwork can be affected by such withdrawal.
• All children will tend to fear abandonment. The death of a pet may lead to the expectation that their parents may die.
• Children might resort to regress such as temper tantrums or thumb sucking.

The presence of death itself could arouse the curiosity of the child and may cause them to ask so many questions about the event. As parents, it is your duty to honestly explain the phenomenon and answer questions as factually as possible. You don’t have to go through tedious explanations if you answer sincerely and truthfully.

Dear Readers,

The Jun / Jul 11 issue of our Singapore Parenting Magazine - Today’s Motherhood Online Parenting Magazine Singapore is out now.

Below are the highlights of this issue:

• What To Look Out For When Hiring A Confinement Nanny
• HELP! My Child Steals Is That Normal?
• Helping Your Toddler Outgrow His Pacificer
• Sleep Well For Better Academic Results
• Ovarian Cancer Signs And Symptoms To Look Out For
• Neurofeedback Therapy
• and many more.

To read our Free Parenting Magazine, go to Today’s Motherhood.

To get our latest updates, remember to join our mailing list today :)

Congratulations to the winners of Today’s Motherhood Win Coach Wallets May 2011. They have won a Coach Wallet each.

• Cheong Bin Wen
• Chang Jun Xin

*Winners will be notified by email/phone individually.

** Terms and Conditions Apply

The prizes are sponsored by todaysmotherhood.com.

To thank all our readers for supporting us over the past 2 years, we at today’s motherhood are giving away TWO pairs of Shaw Premiere Movie Tickets worth $100 this June 2011. Ends 30 June 2011.

Simply like us in our Facebook Fans Page

Share this good news with your friends in Facebook = 2x chances

Further 2 more chances if you join Our Great Parenting Deals Page

So why wait. Join us now if you have not!

Note : For existing fans, you will still need to fill in 1. Your Name 2. Contact # 3. Your Email on this Page and click “Enter”

Terms and Conditions Apply

Snap! Entertainment and Today’s Motherhood are giving away free Rocket into Reading / Math DVDs to 23 lucky Today’s Motherhood readers. Each winner will get a DVD of their choice from the 6 reviewed titles. Contest ends 24 Jun 2011. See below for contest details. Read our reviews on these DVDs - Rocket Into Reading Phonics And Math first.

Do you know that music is a powerful tool that enhances children’s learning from an early age?

Teach your child to read through music today!

The Rocket Into Reading DVD series will teach your child to read over 1000 words. Original music, lyrics and animated flashcards are filled with rhythm, rhyme and alliteration children will love learning with.

Rocket into Reading Phonics DVD Series

• Alphabet and Letter Sounds
• Short Vowel Word Families
• Long Vowel Word Families
• Blends and Digraphs
• Multiple Sounds and Spelling

Each of the words featured in the Reading Phonics DVD series are cleverly made into a short story and composed into a catchy song. One example is learning the sounds of the letter ‘U’, the song goes, “The camel was very cute, but he was born a mute, so he learned to play the flute…” Children not only learn new vocabulary words, but they also learn the concept of rhyme and alliteration. In addition, each word is accompanied by visual aids in the form of cute cartoons, which makes it highly suitable for audio and visual learners.

Rocket into Math (Multiplication Songs that teach!) DVD

• Sing To Learn Multiplication

Concise and catchy, The Sing To Learn Multiplication makes learning times table so easy! Children can also learn the multiplication by clapping to the rhythm of the song.

The Rocket into Reading is a great alternative to learning dry and mundane concepts. Grab these DVDs and sing along with your child today!

For a preview of Rocket Into Reading Phonics Songs that Teach, click here.

Reviewed by Michelle Ang

Giveaway Contest

23 lucky Today’s Motherhood readers will get to win a DVD of their choice from the 6 reviewed titles. Contest ends 24 Jun 2011. To take part in this giveaway all you have to do is

1. Join Today’s Mother Mailing List below (existing members need not sign up again. New members need to check your email after signup to confirm subscription)

2. Be a fan of Snap! Entertainment

3. Fill in the form below

The prizes are sponsored by Snap! Entertainment

Terms and Conditions Apply.

The dreamgenii® Twinkle Tog will keep your toddler warm and snug during the night.

Some young children kick off their covers during the night leaving them cold and exposed and the answer to this, up until now, has been a traditional children’s sleeping bag.

Whilst younger babies love the cocoon effect of the sleeping bag, toddlers like to move around and be free to explore their environment and this can lead to them becoming frustrated at the restrictive nature of the sleeping bag.

Drawing upon all of the benefits of the traditional sleeping bag the dreamgenii® Twinkle Tog allows your toddler to move around freely, naturally and unrestricted in their bed, avoiding those upsetting tumbles as they try to get out of bed when their legs are trapped in a sleeping bag.

The Twinkle Tog allows you to change your child into their night time covers before they go to bed. If you travel in the car during the evening, the dreamgenii® Twinkle Tog allows your toddler to be unstrapped easily from their car seat and transferred to bed without unnecessary disturbance.

With a quilted outer, and a soft jersey lining, the dreamgenii® Twinkle Tog will ensure that your toddler has a comfortable, undisturbed and cosy night - quite simply A Magical Night’s Sleep.

Patent Pending

More designs are available at www.diapers.com.sg

[Please Note the New Dates- Now on Saturday July 9 for 1/2 day due to parent request]

This program is unique because it incorporates child development, child brain develop, exploration of parent attachment and values along with evidenced based parenting skills. This parenting Skills Development workshop will help you end the frustration of scolding, nagging, complaining, criticizing, blaming and canning and given you the confidence and skills to be an effective happy parent. This workshop is designed for parents who would like to become more effective and bring fun back into parenting and happiness into the household.

Program can be applied to children from 2 to 16 for issues such as:

• Getting ready for school in the morning
• Bathing
• Meal times
• Homework
• General compliance

The effectiveness of this program is we address the development of your child so that the interventions you apply are age appropriate. While many parenting programs and books provide valid parenting interventions, they often fail to address core issues of child development, child brain development, and a parent’s attachment style- which are all critical to the successful implementation of parenting skills.

If you find yourself doing and saying things you swore that you’d never do because you didn’t like it when your parent’s did it, this is related to your parenting attachment style and the fact that we parent the way we were parented- unless we take steps to change our parenting approach through education and knowledge.

Without being aware of how we were parented and where our parenting values come from, it makes it harder to implement effective parenting techniques consistently and for the long term.

Also if you don’t understand your child’s mental and emotional level, applying interventions not designed for the right age of your child won’t be effective.

Tangible benefits of our PSD program usually include:

• Better parent/child relationship
• Begin shift from nagging parent to coach
• Improved parenting confidence
• Better child compliance
• Increased cooperation

The class will be small with a maximum of 6-7 parents who all want to improve their parenting skills. Small class size will offer more individual attention to address specific needs and provide enhanced feedback. This will be hands on helping you to build upon your existing parenting strengths and skills to make them more effective.

Schedule: 1/2 day from 10am to 2pm

• Discussion of Attachment
• Parent and child attachment style
• Assessing Parent’s history of parenting and parenting values
• Child Development
• Child development review
• Child brain development
• Reframing discipline away from Punishment
• Learning effective parenting skills that teach a child how to think, build self-esteem and improve parent and child relationship
• Tasks to try new skills at home

Location: 55 Market Street, Level 10, next to the Bank of Singapore Building.

MRT: Raffles Place, 4 minute walk

Park: Across at Golden Shoe car park

Who Should Attend: Any parent wanting to improve their parenting skills, improve their relationship with their child and have greater peace and happiness at home. This program is not designed for children to attend
Cost: $250 for 1/2 day for 1 parent or $350 for both parents. Includes drinks and lights snacks..

For questions contact: Tammy Fontana, MS, NCC at +65 9030 7239 or tammy@allinthefamilycounselling.com

To purchase your ticket or find out more information, visit All In The Family Counselling

We face stress and anxiety in our daily lives. However, during pregnancy, these two feelings are normally heightened, especially if the pregnant mother is working. Of course, support from immediate family members and the spouse could help in alleviating the level of anxiety. A lot of questions will start to arise, especially if for a first time mother. These are a few general questions that they might find asking themselves:

Can I still eat oily, fried food and drink alcohol?
A person’s current health condition can affect his or her state of mind. Some women may be more health conscious after finding out they are pregnant.

What will my friends or family think of me?
Women who are not prepared of having a baby may think about how their family or in-laws perceive them and accept them of their new responsibility. Some mothers would also worry about their older children’s views about the arrival of a new sibling.

Can husband and wife still go for dates?
Couples could be affected by the thought of future financial and social responsibilities once the baby is born. A new addition to the family would mean more expenses and a change in lifestyle.

Will my career be affected?
The modern professional woman may fear that pregnancy might hinder in her career development and success, as she will be away for maternity leave.

Will Stress Affect my Baby?
Excessive stress and anxiety are unhealthy for both you and your baby. Studies have shown that low birth weight and pre-term labor are due to high stress and anxiety. In addition, high level of stress causes increased heart rates, high blood pressure and chronic anxiety. It is important to constantly check on your emotional condition because it will affect your baby.

How do I Manage Stress?
Managing stress does not solely depend on the people around you. Here are some things you can control, to combat your stress and anxiety:

• Eat a healthy and well-balanced diet. You are what you eat. Your body undergoes a major physical transformation during pregnancy. Also, you are eating for two. Eat less healthy food in moderation, and think twice before munching on junk food.

• Reducing chores. Refrain from doing too many household chores, especially during the first trimester. Try to reduce the chores and work which you used to do before you were pregnant. Discuss with your partner on how he can help you with the house chores or engage a temporary maid to help you.

• Rest. As much as possible, never shortchange your beauty sleep. A short siesta and a good night’s sleep are important in helping to relax your body.

• Exercise. Exercising helps to produce happy hormones known as endorphins in our body. Simple exercise such as taking a walk, doing yoga, or swimming, are a few some ways you can try to cope with your stress levels.

• Talk to your partner or spouse. Keeping those feelings inside you will not do you or your loved ones around you any good. Communicating with your spouse or partner provides an outlet for you to share your thoughts, feelings and worries.

Shaws Little League was first conceived in 2004, where an outdoor sports programme was developed and operated at the Shaws Preschool, as an alternative to the normal outdoor play, and another means to develop children’s physical ability. After four years of research and encouragement from parents, Shaws Little League finally came to fruition. Shaws Little League is the longest running multi-sport programme for children in Singapore.

Today’s Motherhood had a chat with one of Shaws Little League founder, Alpesh Puna, to find out more about its philosophy and programme.

How did the idea of Shaws Little League come about?
Shaws Little League is basically the outcome of our own love of sport combined with seeing the happiness on children’s faces when they successfully kick the ball into the goal, hit a home run, make the game saving tackle, or just show us how much they love to play sport. We emphasis heavily on the fun factor, which we hope will eventually instill a sense of love for sports in young children.

What makes Shaws Little League different from the other sports classes out there?
Shaws Little League is a multi-sport programme – children are exposed to a range of different sports. The sports in our programme at present are volleyball, tennis, rugby, hockey, basketball, baseball, cricket, soccer, golf and athletics. It is based on research that suggests that children should not specialize in a particular sport at a young age, but instead try a range of sports before specializing at a later stage. We understand that we are the first in South East Asia to develop such a programme for young children.

Our programme has been developed by Dr. Astrid Simon of the German Sport University, Shaws Preschool in Singapore, and international athletes and coaches and has been especially designed for young children and therefore is age appropriate. By having a range of specialists, we are able to get the best of everything in developing our programme.

In addition to children having fun, we focus on three essential elements: exposing children to different sports, maximizing participation, and improving their skills. Parents are also welcomed to watch all of our sessions. The parents not only cheer for their child, but they cheer for all the children. We believe in creating such a culture, and this sets a very positive and encouraging environment.

What age group does Shaws Little League cater to?
Our multi-sport programme is for 2 to 9 year olds. Our sports specific classes (tennis & cricket) cater for children up to the age of 12.

Can you share with us some highlights of any of your programs?

Our programmes are heavily focused on skill acquisition and development – in all of our classes, we address the key skills in each of the sports that we conduct. We understand that skill development does not occur in a vacuum and therefore a number of our activities are game-based and dynamic, which requires the children to think on their feet and act accordingly. This helps in developing their game sense. A number of parents have commented on how much their children enjoy playing sport at Shaws, how much they have improved and how they can do certain skills that seem beyond their age.

What is the teacher to child ratio in each class, and what is the class size?
The ratio is 1 teacher to 5 children, with a maximum of 14 children in each class. Our staff are also highly qualified and trained – we have a number of Sports Diploma and Degree trained staff. In addition to those qualifications, all of our staff undergo a large amount of internal training in the Shaws method and approach. Most importantly, they love working with young children and derive great satisfaction when they see the children improve and have a great time.

Safety is a key concern in a lot of parents, especially when they start sports at such a young age. How do you address this concern?
We take a holistic approach to safety – from checking footwear and clothing, ensuring that the equipment is the right size for all children, the layout of our activities and how we work with the children. We also ensure that various activities are tailored to the abilities of the children. We are also very patient with children, and that allows them to learn and build up their own confidence before attempting more difficult activities.

We take particular care in developing the fundamental movement skills (including falling and landing) to make sure that children are better prepared. Of course they have a great time doing all these things as well. In addition to the above measures, at least one of our staff in each of the sessions is first aid trained.

What are the demographics of the children at Shaws Little League?
We have a very diverse group of children - 60% of our children are non-Singaporeans and come from all around the world, so it is a very multi-cultural environment. However, we are beginning to see more local children coming for our classes. In addition to having children who have developed outstanding physical ability, we also have children with special needs, from slight physical disabilities to children with ADHD. All of who love to play sport and improve their skills. We believe there is a way to work with every child to love sports.

You have coached in New Zealand for many years before coming to Singapore. Can you share with us some of your coaching experience in New Zealand?
The key difference between New Zealand and Singapore is the attitude of parents towards their children playing - parents in New Zealand are more open to their children playing sport. However it is starting to change in Singapore, and I see more parents getting their children involved in sports and other physical activities, and not just for achievement reasons.

The major similarity between both countries is that NZ children and Singaporean children all love to play. Another similarity between both countries is the high expectations parents have of their children. One thing that we did in Singapore was to get the parents to participate in a class just so that they understood how much effort the children had to put in to each of the activities and how much skill, movement and activity that each child is exposed to in every class at Shaws Little League.

For more information, please visit their website, www.shawslittleleague.com or contact Alpesh at 6440 9545.

Shaws Little League @ The Cage
38 Jalan Benaan Kapal (Near Kallang Leisure Park)
Singapore 399635

About Alpesh Puna
Originating from New Zealand, Alpesh is a former international athlete who has played hockey at the highest level. The highlight being playing in the 2002 World Cup and being part of the training squad for the Athens Olympics. In addition to a heavy involvement in sport from a playing perspective, Alpesh has more than 12 years sports coaching experience, with particular focus on youth and grassroots development. In addition to being a qualified coach, Alpesh has an honours degree in accounting and economics and has been a qualified chartered accountant.

Equipping your child with the right knowledge and skills for P1

Intensive P1 Preparatory Class (English, Math & Chinese)

Options: English + Math (+ Chinese optional)
Frequency: Twice a week (Every Wednesday and Friday)
Duration: 20 weeks (40 lessons)
Time: 1 hour (+30 minutes optional)

Small Class Size: 8
1st intake: 29 Jun 2011

For more details:

Visit us at #09-09/10 City Square Mall
Contact us at www.leapschoolhouse.com.sg
or Tel: 6634 0828

Jointly organised by:

LEAP SchoolHouse
Soma School